Locus of control

The book I am writing is also about making proactive changes from an internal locus of control. The concept of locus of control was developed by Julian Rotter in 1954 and in my opinion, is an essential personal leadership skill. Your locus of control is the belief you have about how much control you have over the things that happen in your life.

People with an external locus of control believe that external events and forces determine what happens to them whereas people with an internal locus of control believe that their choices and actions determine what happens to them. There is no doubt that external events like economic downturns and job losses are outside of your control and may have a significant impact on your life and career but if you have an internal locus of control you will respond by making proactive decisions that adapt to the circumstances more quickly and effectively. 

Someone with an external locus of control may have a more fatalistic approach to events and developments and feel that they have no choice but to be pushed in a direction they don’t necessarily want to go. However, someone with an internal locus of control will be more proactive in ‘course correcting’ and have more resilience around using developments to their advantage and adapting to unexpected and unwanted changes. 

It takes two to tango

It takes two parties to form a relationship but only one to break it. Either you are making the break or the other party is. When the relationship is a contractual arrangement between you and an employer, you can choose to resign and move on to something new or the employer can terminate the employment contract for their own reasons. Although I will discuss situations in which you are on the receiving end of a break in a relationship, this is not the primary focus of the book. Instead, this book is about empowering you to act from an internal locus of control, putting you in the driving seat and empowering you to make the decision that leads to the break in a relationship, when it is necessary. 

Reasons to leave a relationship

There are many reasons why you may feel it’s time to leave a relationship. It may be that there is a misalignment in values, a change in interests and priorities or an incompatibility in the relationship as a result of poor match quality. The speed at which this realisation emerges can vary but inevitably it leads to an accumulation of stress and strain that eventually becomes untenable. This is what breaking points are all about. 

Regardless of the reasons, if and when you find yourself at a breaking point you will need to make some decisions about what to do next and how to make it happen. A lack of clarity can be crippling, especially when there are anchors holding you back and letting go of the past is not easy. 

Empowerment

I hope the book will empower you with the insights and inspiration to leverage your internal locus of control in such a way that you can use breaking points to get realignment with the things that are important to you and that give your life and career purpose and meaning.  

It takes two parties to form a relationship but only one to break it.